dark and icy escapades

We have been getting a wonderful amount of winter weather up here. I love a snow day. Even if it means losing money. On a snow day there is nothing to do but relax. All growing up I remember watching the radar and thinking "If we were just a little further north we'd have a snow day today." We are there. 


Work was canceled Monday after snow Sunday night. We had quite a nice dusting. It was just enough to be pretty and to can work. Hooray! Frandz kept the stove chugging all day. It was a lovely day of hot cocoa, crocheting but sorry, no blogging. 


I went to work Tuesday. Normal day. However I noticed a weather advisory sitting on my manager's desk for Wednesday. Boy were they right. 


I went to work Wednesday and it was already snowing. I could see the waves of snow move over the lake and across the mountains. It was breath taking. There is also a new guy at work who is contributing a fair amount of awesome. We chatted and worked together on various restaurant side work. We were in awe at how much everyone was freaking out about the weather. Everyone was already begging to go home and only a few flakes had fallen. I was pretty sure we weren't going to have any diners but I at least wanted my hourly wage. Admittedly, deep down, I was pretty sure it was going to be another snow, er ice day. 


And it was! People's families started calling and asking for them to come home. Reports of 75 and 575 being slippery, blue flashing light, crash-tastic skating rinks started pouring in via text and phone. We started getting cut. We were asked who lived the farthest away and who had four wheel drive. We had a party of about 40 coming in and I couldn't believe they didn't cancel it. Folks that live in Jasper and beyond got cut first. Finally I was the one furthest from home and was let go. I honestly think if I had been let go 15 minutes later I would not have made it home. I barely made it as it was. 


I got in my car and called to tell Frandz I was on my way. I didn't want to be chatting while driving on ice, call me crazy. I let the car heat up a bit, something I'm bad about, but thank goodness I did. As soon as I was on the road I felt icy patches. I went super slow. Like no more than 11 miles an hour. I was pretty scared. The ice was no joke. Ice started to form on my windshield, with a quickness. Within seconds there was a tiny space about as big as my had for me to peer through. OMG, I thought. What am I going to do!? I glanced at my car temp and it had miraculously reached mid temp already, somehow. I blasted the defrost on high. The thin coat of ice slid off. Phew. I could see again. This would prove to be only a small hurdle of several. 


I skidded and slid down the mountain as slowly as I could, gripping the steering wheel with knuckles white, as if that would make a difference. As I neared the exit gate I began to slide. A LOT. I had no traction. Somehow I made it out. I really don't know how. I really thought I would have to park and walk to the gate.  There is almost no shoulder and I feared leaving my car parked would mean bad bad things. But I somehow managed to glide from iceless patch to iceless patch, gaining just enough traction to move forward a foot or two at time.  The magnificent Colonel, ever reliable, climbed out to the main road. I was hoping it would be better due to higher traffic. 


No dice!! It was awful. I was fish-tailing like crazy! The ice had formed so quickly that no one had even had a chance to spread salt or gravel. I quickly called Frandz and told him I would be leaving my truck at the grocery store and that he would need to use the four wheel power of Agnes to retrieve me. I knew once I got off the main highway that the Colonel would not be able to traverse the tiny, curvy back roads to our house. 


Much to my surprise, Frandz didn't seem all that keen to come get me. I guess there was no way to know how bad it was from the warmth of our house. It really did happen fast. When I yelled "I'm sliding again! I'm hanging up!" I think that finally convinced him. I slowly slid to a cafe about four miles from our house and parked. About that time Frandz called and told me he was on the road and he wasn't sure even Agnes would make it. He advised me to start walking. We agreed that he would make it as far as Agnes could and then he would start walking too.  He would meet me on foot and we'd walk to the truck together. I topped off the anti-freeze in my truck, left a please-don't-tow-me note in the door of the cafe, wrapped my scarf around my head and started my slippery hike. 


I should take a moment here to thank my mom for words of wisdom shared with me around the age of 7 that have never left me. We were going to run to the store for milk on a very cold night and I got in the car with a light jacket and slippers, planning on waiting in the car with my brother while she shopped. She insisted I get completely suited up, socks, shoes, gloves, the works. When I protested she said "What if we get in a wreck or the car breaks down? You'll freeze in that!" While nothing happened that night those words have often rung in my head as I've prepared to leave the house. While I knew I only needed a jacket to make it across the parking lot to work I added a thick scarf and gloves before leaving. Thanks mom!! In the same vein of preparedness I also keep a flashlight in my purse, another win. 


So, well bundled with flashlight in hand I started my trek. It really wasn't even that dark. I knew I wouldn't have to walk too far and was pretty cheerful and fearless, which surprised me. I'm kinda afraid of the dark, or more accurately afraid of what or who might be in the dark. But I knew that anyone who was out in this weather was just trying to get home, like me. I was pretty sure there would be no bear attack either. Before too long a truck drove past and offered me a ride. I declined at first but then accepted. I squished in with a Santa Claus looking gent and his daughter and took it as a good sign. 


That was silly. 


Santa apparently had something to prove. After attempting (and failing at) a couple maneuvers, including trying to pull around a stuck car and then sliding into it, I decided I would be better off on foot after all. Right about then, my knight in shining armor came to save me. The second time he (and Agnes) have saved me (and the Colonel) from an icy tragedy. I couldn't have been happier to see him. 


Very slowly. More like in micro movements I worked across the ice coated road. Frandz pulled me across the last few feet by my purse's shoulder straps. You could have skated across the street. It was a complete sheet of ice.


After some impressive and careful tire dancing Frandz had us turned around moving back up the hill. With one tire on the road and one in the brush we crept along. This part seemed to last forever, and it was tense. I have a feeling that if I had looked at my watch it was less than minutes. At the top of the ridge closest to our house we saw our neighbors, who happily piled into the bed of the truck, giddy not to have to walk the rest of the way in the dark and sleet. 


As we dropped them off they thanked us and said "Don't let this scare you out of living in the sticks. This is the only time it's happened to us in seven years."


Scare us away? I can't wait for the next snow day. 

adventures in bureaucracy...in two counties

Now that I am a gainfully employed server in Pickens county I must have a alcohol server license. Apparently servers within the city limit of Jasper are exempt and must simply be 18. But the rest of the county has to go to the county jail to get their license. 


Yes. The jail. 


Silly me I thought it would be the courthouse. What was I thinking?! I walked into the courthouse where I was met by 3, yes THREE, guards and a metal detector. I swear the federal building downtown doesn't have 3 guards at the door. I told them I needed an alcohol license. 
"Which one? Serving or pouring?" 
I paused to consider this. I will be doing both; pouring the beverage into the glass and taking it to the table. I wondered which one I was in fact going to be doing as far as Pickens county code was concerned. 
"I don't really know. I'm a waitress. I just needed whichever one enables me to carry a glass of wine to someone's table.
"Serving. You need to go to the jail."
Super! 
To their credit they were very helpful and gave me good directions to the jail. All 3 of them.


So I went to the jail and had my picture made and my finger prints made (you know like you do when you are being booked into jail?) so that I can hand beer to people. Not exactly sure what all these thing had to do with each other but I want to keep my job so I jumped through the bureaucratic hoops. 


Also? It cost me FIFTY FIVE Freaking Dollars! What what?! Thankfully they only take cash because if I had to look at that charge over and over again on my bank statement it would make me so mad. If I renew before 12/10/11 it will only cost me $15. I have already put the date on next year's calendar. 


And that was just the first part of my day. 


Then I went to one of the Cherokee county tag offices to request a new copy of my car title. When I registered my car in Cherokee they took my old title and told me they would mail me a new one. "Riiiiiiight." I thought. Like I really want the document that says I own my car going through the mail. I tired to bargain with the clerk but she was having none of it. That's the thing with bureaucracy. There is no wiggle room. 


So when I did not, in fact, get my title in the mail for 3 months I decided to investigate. The woman I spoke to on the phone said that I could come on down to the tag office (only a 35 minute drive from my house!) and fill out a form for a new one. It would cost me $8. I really didn't mean to complain, she was being helpful. But the shock rushed out of my mouth in the form of " I have to pay $8 to replace something that got lost?!" Then she admitted that if I came in before 12/21 I could have it replaced for free. I didn't press any further about the seeming arbitrary-ness of that date. I just said thank you and resigned myself to get it out of the way that day. 


The rest really went pretty fine. I don't think I have the energy to retell the whole tale. I did get there right before a whole bunch of other people and avoid a massive line. Weeeeee!


Once my deeds of bureaucratic form filing were complete I treated myself to a bean burrito. Because I really know how to live it up!!


And then...I went xmas shopping. 

the pond froze yesterday and today

What's really crazy is that it happened after the sun rose. It was partially iced over when I first looked out the window as I slipped on my boots to go collect small wood. After I got the fire going I made a bagel and some tea. I glanced at the pond and the ice covered the whole thing. Not like ice skating covered but still ice over the whole top.


I worked a double today and will be working one tomorrow. My writing is suffering, I know. But my bank account also suffered for longer than I was really comfortable with. So if I have to back burner my blog a little I will have to live with it. 


So yeah. Right now I'm pretty tired. Really I think I'm over tired and keyed up but the Baileys on the rox I just chugged enjoyed is kicking in an doing it's night-cappy job. I can feel the engine slowing. 


Speaking of night caps I don't need one. Because our wood stove is that awesome. That and the down comforter. Props to whoever thought stuffing feathers in a blanket was not gross but a super awesome idea. Because it is. 


I did spring for a $14.99 super fuzzy bathrobe though. For in the morning when the wood stove has stalled out and a new fire hasn't been built yet. And, oh yeah, I'm wearin it right now.  So also for when I get home from working a double and I want to take my work clothes off but know I will be going to bed soon enough to not sully another separate outfit. I feel I have already gotten my $15 worth. 


Here's how I shop for a bathrobe ( and just about anything else honestly). Go to a discount place like Ross, TJ Maxx or Le Targe. Because I almost never pay full retail. Im just too cheap. Find the area with the item I am looking for. Shirts, pants, robes, whatev. Then I bend down and look for the longest one. Whatever is hanging down past the others. Then I check the price. Then I check the size. If the stars align I have a winner and we go to the dressing room together. Although I honestly do that less and less. I am a big fan of the over-the-clothes-in-front-of-a-mirror thing. Such are the shopping habits of a tall cheapskate. Not the best combination really. My new robe is pink, white and mint green plaid. Not exactly my first choice. I look like I'm in my pre-show dressing gown for the nut cracker. Except no tights. 
But I knew I was not going to beat $15, in any color. 


So here I sit; a nice warm pepperminty freak. There is no doubt that my neighbors can see me in the yard gathering wood. I can probably be seen from space.